The Real Feeling
by Mrs. Scott Kennedy
Summary: Slash, squirrelly lovin'. Foamy gets fed up with Pilz-E's constant pill-popping, and decides to take matters in to his own hands, a slightly different way. M for language and sexual themes


**Hey. So this story is a oneshot, and it was kind of just written on a whim. I hope you like it, and haters are welcome to review. I just love the idea of Foamy and Pilz-E being together (especially the idea of Foamy having a softer side)!**

"Dude, Pil-Z. Just… just calm the fuck down, alright? You're stressin' me out, man." I rolled my eyes as my friend Pilz-E was bouncing off the walls, rambling about the color green.

"Gr-gr-green is-is-is-is everywhere! The… the tr-trees and gr-grass! And… and… a lot a lot of the pills I t-take are gr-gr-green too! Whoo…!"

"Pilz-E it's a color. Chill man. Just… just chill."

"But I can't. There are so-so many things th-at are gr-gr-green! Like, like, like," He stood in one place, bouncing up and down, so I took the moment to grab him by his tiny, squirrely shoulders and make sure he didn't move. "Whatwhatwhatwhat are you d-doing?" He stuttered, then his eye widened. He stopped moving. His eyes seemed to be getting bigger and bigger. He seemed to be focusing on something in particular.

"What? What are you looking at? Are you trippin' out again, man?"

"No… not this time F-F-Foamy. I just noticed… your eyes-s. Theythey are v-very green indeed! Even the gr-rass is less gr-green than your eyes! And the trees! _Oh the trees-s…_" He started to mumble about the trees in his own little world, which I was glad of. I felt my cheeks get hot at his comment about my eyes. In his little world of drug-induced happiness, he didn't exactly realize that some of the stuff he said actually affected people in the outside world. I snapped out of _my _world when he started bouncing up and down again. "Parkparkparkpark! Let us go to the p-park of happiness where fun is to be had there on the swings and the slides and the woodchips…!"

"Yeah uh you know what Pilz? We're just going to stay here tonight. It's kind of late and I don't want you hurting yourself, o-okay?" I felt _myself _stutter.

"You-you are concerned for m-m-my safety? Well that's-that's very th-thoughtful of you, f-f-friend!" He smiled, which made me smile; a rare occurrence.

There was something about Pilz-E that just made me happy to be around. His whole attitude towards life (though altered by his drug-filled "reality"), his whole demeanor made me think a little better about myself. Almost an… "At least I'm not _that _guy" attitude. But it wasn't exactly that. I wasn't friends with the lunatic squirrel because he made me feel better about myself. There was something else that he made me feel. Like happiness, but not quite. It was really, I hated to say it, something that could only be described in one of Germaine's God awful poems.

"So-so-so-so-so Foamy. What're we g-going to be d-d-d-doing n-now, oh kin-kind f-friend of mine-ine?" His pupils had started to get smaller, so I could tell he was getting off of his high.

"Weelll, I was thinking we could just watch a movie or something. I just want to get your mind off of something in particular." More like _my _feelings off of something in particular. That particular something being a particular squirrel, that wasn't me this time.

"P-p-particular? You mean l-like my med-ication? Oh that reminds me! I have to take some more of these pretty b-blue pills!" Pilz-E pulled a small orange prescription bottle from who-knows-where and started to fumble with the child-proof cap. Or "proof of child caps" as he liked to call them. "Can you help me open this pr-proof of child cap?" He asked. He held out the bottle, and the expression on his intoxicated face look strangely innocent. Something I couldn't really resist.

What the fuck was wrong with me?

I sighed. "Hand it over." He did and I fumbled with the cap to. I then realized what I was doing. I didn't _want _him to be on pills. I wished he could just experience real happiness for once. "Uh how about you just lay off the pills tonight, okay?" I asked as pleasantly as possible, but he was having none of it.

"No-no-no! I n-need my pills! You know about the bi-tter squirrel I become without my pre-scription!" He exclaimed.

"No man, I'm serious. I think you should just lay off of these for a night."

"Nooo!" He pleaded. "P-p-p-p-p-please! I n-n-n-n-n-need those-se! Those are v-ery i-mportant! The diseases I could get could be fatal and tra-vel to my eye-balls! Then to my ear! Down to my foot! Then my foot would turn-turn b-blue! I need my pills!"

"Oh yeah? What do these ones do?" I loved being the bad guy. But not to my best friend. Not when my best friend looked like he was about to cry. Even though he did talk about his pills all the time, I couldn't help but feel bad for him.

"T-those pills are f-for my hallucinations-s-s. The hallucinations-s-s are a res-sult from o-ther pills that I take to solve another s-side effect. I need those ones."

"Mmm, no you don't. I'm locking these up. There's nothing you can do about it."

"Oh yes-s I can. You've even told-d me, if any-anyone pisses me off-ff-ff, that I can just release my… squirrely wrath… _whooo…_" I cursed myself. I had taught him that. Pilz growled and lunged at me, landing on my chest with so much force that it knocked the pills out of my hand and went scattering all over the floor. The "proof of child caps" weren't as helpful as they so thought. All my mind could focus on was all of Pilz-E's weight on me. He wasn't that heavy, but the force of his jump hurt. "I've released the p-ills!" He exclaimed. He was about to jump off of my chest to the ground when I grabbed his front two paws, leaving them connected to my chest. "What… what are you doing? I mu-st get my pills-s!"

"I just can't have this on my conscience. I promised myself I wouldn't let you do this anymore. You're not going to!" I shouted through gritted teeth. I managed to flip the two of us around so I was on top of him, my legs touching the ground from both of his sides, my hands gripping his shoulders, and my face inches away from his.

"You. Have. A. Serious. Fucking. Problem. My. Friend. Knock it the _fuck _off." I growled and he whimpered slightly.

"My… my medication!" He shouted, reaching for a pill that was inches away from his grasping paw.

"No Pilz! Stop it!" I grabbed his paw and brought it to his chest. I grabbed the other one and did the same.

"Why are you hol-d-ding my hands the same way the hu-man lady and man cou-ples do at the p-p-ark?" He asked, obviously forgetting why I was on top of him in the first place. The idiot…

"To stop you from… nevermind." I stopped talking, and the air went still. Pilz stopped twitching for a couple of minutes, and I relaxed and rested my head on his fuzzy chest. Even though his heart was beating abnormally fast, I ignored it and snuggled into his chest some more. Slowly, I began to unwrap my paw away from his and scoot it towards his face. He accepted it, but as soon as I caressed his cheek, he flung me off of his torso and grabbed for the pills. "Pilz-E no!" I launched myself and grabbed his crazy-looking tail. I pulled him back and dragged him to my room, leaving the pills unattended.

"But the pills! Without them, I will be lost, and have to see-ee r-reality!" He clawed at the carpet.

"No!" That's when things turned ugly.

"I hate you Foamy! I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you! Fucking j-jackass!" He grunted and shouted and protested as I brought him into my room and slammed the door. Once I let him free, he backed up to my small bed that was about five feet away from the door and took a deep breath. On his exhale, he growled fiercely, and a small bit of drool started to dribble out of the side of his mouth. He got down on all four, ready to charge. I held out my arms, which made him angrier. "FOOOR! T-THE! PILL-LLS!" He stuttered, and charged straight to me.

His attack knocked the wind out of me, but now I was clutching him close, rubbing his back, telling him to calm down. It felt like… well it almost felt like the way Germaine talked about the feelings she had with her stalker boyfriend. The way her heart seemed to flutter and pound at the same time. That's exactly how I was feeling. She had described it as love, but I had no idea how I could love an imbecile like Pilz-E. He leaned back, struggling to get out of my grip. I stared into his giant, glossy eyes. I finally couldn't take it anymore. I leaned into him and pressed my mouth against him. He struggled more, obviously confused by the gesture, but I was confused too. I had no idea what I was doing. I "dipped" him onto the ground, all while kissing him. He tried hitting me and kicking me, but I just kept my mouth firmly against his, waiting for him to shut up. Finally, he slowly wrapped his arms around my waist, leaning into the kiss more. He separated us to say, "You know this is a very odd sensation in the pit of my stomach that I've-ve never felt before because I've alw-ays been on the pil-ls, but now you've showed me and this is different and I've only seen it in movies and you're my friend and without the pills I feel nice and hi." I laughed at his idiocy and kissed him again, digging my claws into his back fur. He gave a low growl to signify pain. Slowly I let my tongue seep into his mouth and I started to feel horny. I could feel Pilz-e was too, which was surprising considering all of the pills that were suppressing his emotions, and I pressed myself into him. He yelped at first, then moaned. I started to grasp lower through his ratted fur, but suddenly…

_Knock knock knock! _

The door opened and a familiar voice rang through my room.

"Foamy I-," I quickly looked up from my position on Pilz-E to see Gemaine gaping at the squirrely activities that were happening on the floor. "What the Hell?" She yelled.

**All characters belong to iLL WiLL PreSS, Home of Neurotically Yours. Thank you for reading!**


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